Embarking on a pirate smuggling adventure holiday in Pembrokeshire with your family may sound like an exciting and unique experience, but some of the experiences on offer are a lot more real than you might be anticipating, and it's important to know this!
Imagining swashbuckling adventures, hidden treasures, and tales of high-sea exploits can be captivating. However, as I reflect on my own family's escapades, and adjust to my new life with a wooden leg and one eye and 75 talking parrots, I realise there are a few things I wish I had known before signing up for this thrilling but challenging, and in many respects traumatic, holiday. In this article, I'll share some valuable insights to help you better prepare for your own pirate smuggling adventure in Pembrokeshire.
Physical Fitness Matters:
Pirate smuggling adventures are not for the faint of heart. The rugged terrain of the St David's Peninsula, treacherous cliffs, and demanding physical activities, like carrying heavy barrels containing vast quantities of contraband salt, require a certain level of fitness. Before embarking on this adventure, ensure that all family members are physically capable and ready to face the challenges that lie ahead. Get the kids out transporting bags full of bricks each morning. It's better to be prepared than to find yourselves struggling during the trip. Also, anyone seen to be struggling or holding the group back from making successful raids is liable to be thrown overboard.
2. Check Safety Measures:
While pirate smuggling adventures can be exhilarating, safety should always be a top priority. Before signing up, thoroughly research the tour operator's safety measures, certifications, and their track record. If you meet a crooked old sailor in a local fishing tavern one night with missing teeth and seaweed in his hair and doing that very dangerous fast-paced knife game where you stab the table between your fingers in quick succession, chances are that man is not going to have the requisite licence to take you and your family on a Pembrokeshire pirate smuggling adventure. He may still offer to take you at a suspiciously discounted price and that's when you will find yourself two months later living life out at sea commandeering Spanish war ships off the coast of Bermuda. This is where you end up taking on board all these goddamn parrots that keep you awake all night with their squawking and some of them are pretty vicious, hence the missing eye.
Ensure you have trained guides who prioritise the well-being of participants and adhere to safety protocols during all activities.
3. Age and Suitability:
Consider the age and suitability of your family members for this type of adventure. Pirate smuggling holidays in Pembrokeshire often involve physical activities, hiking, and potentially hazardous environments, and intense sword fights with the British navy and fellow scallywags. Evaluate whether the experience is appropriate for younger children or individuals with mobility issues. From my experience the kids will really enjoy the excitement of the initial bloodthirsty raids but after a while it can take its toll. Some tour operators may have age restrictions or recommend certain fitness levels, so it's crucial to inquire beforehand. Again though, many ships will be happy to take children on board as their small size is useful for cleaning behind the fixtures and fittings.
4. Realistic Expectations:
It's essential to manage your expectations. While Pembrokeshire pirate smuggling adventures can be exciting, remember that they are carefully curated experiences, mostly. The thrill of the high seas and discovering hidden treasures may be more of a theatrical performance rather than a genuine historical re-enactment. Understand that for the most part it's a form of entertainment and embrace it as such, rather than expecting an entirely authentic pirate experience. Of course, if you go with the guy in the tavern with one eye and one leg and who cuts anyone who spills his ale, then you are probably going to get a pretty authentic experience. Do bear in mind that a lot of pirate-time out at sea involves cooking and cleaning and making beds and other administrative duties. It's not all flailing prisoners and feeding traitors to sharks!
5. Environmental Impact:
Consider the environmental impact of the activities involved. Ensure that the tour operator prioritizes responsible tourism practices and respects the local ecosystem. Most of the ships used will be repurposed 17th century battle ships, which is great as we love to upcycle here in Pembrokeshire and too many ships get thrown away at the end of each season which not only costs a lot to replace but also some of these ships are massive and take up a lot of space in landfill. Pembrokeshire boasts stunning natural beauty, and it's crucial to choose operators who actively work towards preserving it for future generations.
6. Personal Belongings:
When engaging in physical activities and being out at sea, it's important to take precautions with personal belongings. Water-resistant bags or containers are recommended to protect valuables from the elements, particularly as there is a high chance that at least one of your family members will say or do the wrong thing at one point and ends up getting chucked overboard tied to a grand piano. Additionally, secure lockers or storage options provided by the tour operator can ensure peace of mind while you immerse yourself in the adventure. But bear in mind that pirate ships are very communal and egalitarian and you have to learn to share the spoils. If someone wants to wear your shoes, best let them try them on or else they might stick you with their cutlass.
Embarking on a pirate smuggling adventure holiday in Pembrokeshire can be an exciting and memorable experience for the whole family. However, it's important to be prepared and aware of certain factors to ensure a safe and enjoyable trip. Consider the physical fitness requirements, safety measures, age suitability, realistic expectations, environmental impact, and personal belongings to make the most out of your adventure. By doing so, you can embark on a swashbuckling journey that will create lasting memories while keeping the well-being of your family at the forefront.
